Episode 284

Tips on dealing with difficult people

Published on: 29th November, 2022

Hello and welcome to the not so travelling introvert. Today

I'm going to talk about dealing with difficult people or more to the point, how

to tips for dealing with difficult people. No matter where you go in the world

world you will find difficult people and difficult to you might be what's not

difficult. For me, difficult can mean various things and while we go out in the

world and maybe we socialise and socialising is a beneficial activity that most

people look forward to, it can also come with a lot of stress as there are many

difficult people that you have to deal with out there in the world. Just about

anything you do will require dealing with humans and some of those humans will

be difficult at some point from colleagues at work to the people you cross on

the way.


While fulfilling simple everyday errands like grocery

shopping. Dealing with difficult people is frustrating, stressful and can be

downright eggsofting, so there are things that you can do to help deal with

them. And so I want to talk about six tips on how you can make it easier to

deal with difficult people. Don't have high expectations. Don't expect anything

from anyone but yourself.



You can't control others no matter how destructive or

difficult they may be. So lowering your expectations decreases your stress and

allows you to keep control where you can. If you expect nothing then you don't

need to waste your time worrying about what ifs. Stay calm and recognise the

fans. Unfortunately, some situations will require you to work with or be around

difficult humans.



Avoiding them will not work in these situations, so instead

focus on the facts and data and always draw attention to that. Don't add your

emotions to the situation and be as calm and direct as you can be. Using facts

and data to your advantage puts most difficult humans to rest as their only

trying to cause a fuss and don't have supporting facts to help. You can also

practise assertive communication. So assertive communication can be direct and

clear about your boundaries while also being respectful of the needs of others

as well.



This helps difficult humans understand that while you have

boundaries, so do other people. And so you should respect other people's

boundaries as much as you should hope that they would respect yours. Another

thing you could do is maybe find common ground. Many times there are situations

where you can find that common ground that makes it easier to cope with a

difficult human. For example, when you're completing an important work assignment,

both parties have the goal to get the work done and hopefully get to the work

done well.



So putting your differences aside and focusing on that goal

is one of the best ways that you can hope to get the work done successfully.

Another thing you could practise maybe is ignoring their demands or negative

responses. Difficult humans want to get under your skin and cause a reaction.

So don't allow this to happen. Simply ignore them and don't give them that

pleasure to gain control over you and your emotions.



Overall, their opinion or idea of you is really none of your

business or important to where your life is going. This is only a temporary

moment of your life and you have control over your body and mind not to

respond. Sometimes the best response is none at all and you can avoid defensive

and negative behaviour. Don't respond poorly. Take responsibility for the

situation and your actions and reflect on the more you reflect on that other

person's behaviour, the worse the interaction will become.



So just don't just let it go. Practise these things. Next

time you come across a difficult human, remember you are only in control of

yourself. While you cannot change the difficult person, you can control your

all reactions and responses to them. The more confidence and control you have,

the more difficult they will become.



Thank you for listening. This is Janice at

Janice@thecareerintrovert.com helping you build your helping you build your brand

and get hired. Have a great rest of your week.



Transcript

Hello and welcome to the not so travelling introvert. Today I'm going to talk about dealing with difficult people or more to the point, how to tips for dealing with difficult people. No matter where you go in the world world you will find difficult people and difficult to you might be what's not difficult. For me, difficult can mean various things and while we go out in the world and maybe we socialise and socialising is a beneficial activity that most people look forward to, it can also come with a lot of stress as there are many difficult people that you have to deal with out there in the world. Just about anything you do will require dealing with humans and some of those humans will be difficult at some point from colleagues at work to the people you cross on the way.

While fulfilling simple everyday errands like grocery shopping. Dealing with difficult people is frustrating, stressful and can be downright eggsofting, so there are things that you can do to help deal with them. And so I want to talk about six tips on how you can make it easier to deal with difficult people. Don't have high expectations. Don't expect anything from anyone but yourself.

You can't control others no matter how destructive or difficult they may be. So lowering your expectations decreases your stress and allows you to keep control where you can. If you expect nothing then you don't need to waste your time worrying about what ifs. Stay calm and recognise the fans. Unfortunately, some situations will require you to work with or be around difficult humans.

Avoiding them will not work in these situations, so instead focus on the facts and data and always draw attention to that. Don't add your emotions to the situation and be as calm and direct as you can be. Using facts and data to your advantage puts most difficult humans to rest as their only trying to cause a fuss and don't have supporting facts to help. You can also practise assertive communication. So assertive communication can be direct and clear about your boundaries while also being respectful of the needs of others as well.

This helps difficult humans understand that while you have boundaries, so do other people. And so you should respect other people's boundaries as much as you should hope that they would respect yours. Another thing you could do is maybe find common ground. Many times there are situations where you can find that common ground that makes it easier to cope with a difficult human. For example, when you're completing an important work assignment, both parties have the goal to get the work done and hopefully get to the work done well.

So putting your differences aside and focusing on that goal is one of the best ways that you can hope to get the work done successfully. Another thing you could practise maybe is ignoring their demands or negative responses. Difficult humans want to get under your skin and cause a reaction. So don't allow this to happen. Simply ignore them and don't give them that pleasure to gain control over you and your emotions.

Overall, their opinion or idea of you is really none of your business or important to where your life is going. This is only a temporary moment of your life and you have control over your body and mind not to respond. Sometimes the best response is none at all and you can avoid defensive and negative behaviour. Don't respond poorly. Take responsibility for the situation and your actions and reflect on the more you reflect on that other person's behaviour, the worse the interaction will become.

So just don't just let it go. Practise these things. Next time you come across a difficult human, remember you are only in control of yourself. While you cannot change the difficult person, you can control your all reactions and responses to them. The more confidence and control you have, the more difficult they will become.

Thank you for listening. This is Janice at Janice@thecareerintrovert.com helping you build your helping you build your brand and get hired. Have a great rest of your week.

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About the Podcast

The Traveling Introvert
A bite-sized podcast about traveling while running a business and being an introvert.
Not knowing what introversion was until my 30s, I feel that I wasted some of my early years by not really understanding myself. An inspiration for my business is that I want to help others understand themselves better, earlier on in their careers and their lives. Introversion is a very misunderstood area – introverts can suffer mentally and physically because people typecast them or act negatively towards them. It’s not nice to be trapped in a little box. When you label somebody, they tend to act like that label, which stops people from achieving their true potential. I don’t let being an introvert define me, I let it guide me.
If you are looking for some career coaching or just want to reach out
contact me at janice@thecareerintrovert.com