Episode 379
Career Conversations with Matt McCarthy
Matt McCarthy is the founder and president of Questful, a personal coaching and business consulting organization focused on the continued quest toward mission and purpose.
His business consulting is underpinned by 25+ years in business transformation-related roles at organizations of all sizes, across nearly a dozen different industries, as well as by an MBA from Penn State.
In parallel, he has spent well over 10 years studying achievement, wellbeing, and health from the perspectives of psychology, nutrition, neurology, physiology, and mindfulness, making connections between these diverse fields to help others on their quest.
His latest project is the culmination of 5 years studying the reasons we get stuck achieving our goals, and how to break through those areas.
Social media links
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mkmccarthy/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/matt.mccarthy.752
Instagram: @questfullife
Link to website
questful.life
00:00 Energizing introvert interested in things and transactions.
05:04 Traumatic events led to coaching for overcoming obstacles.
08:49 Maintaining emotional well-being through self-care and balance.
12:12 Mindfulness, meditation, walking in nature, journaling.
16:21 Realizing emotional drain, seeking social media help.
17:35 Express anticipation for change, urge balance. Hot dog: sandwich?
Transcript
Hello, and welcome to another episode of Traveling Introvert Career conversations today. I have Matt McCarthy here, and, we are gonna talk all things career. Hi, Matt. How are you doing today?
Matt McCarthy [:I'm great, Janice. Thank you for having me here.
Janice Chaka [:Not a problem. So the first question I ask anyone and everyone who I speak to on this show is, what does introversion mean to you?
Matt McCarthy [:I look at it 2 different ways. 1, I look at it from the technical definition of what energizes you versus what drains your energy. Mhmm. Definitely for me, I'm an Introvert. Being around large numbers of people drains me. The other side is what am I interested in? Am I more interested in, people, or am I more interested in things, transactions, things like that? And I, you know, I love people, but I definitely gravitate more toward things and transactions.
Janice Chaka [:Oh, interesting. I haven't heard that one before. So when did you discover that you were an introvert?
Matt McCarthy [:Oh, long time ago. Probably in my early twenties, taking one of the ever present personality tests.
Janice Chaka [:Oh, and how did that did that change how you sort of, went about dealing with people or situations?
Matt McCarthy [:I don't think it changed anything. I think it more helped me recognize a trait that I already knew in the background. It it it was kind of an Oh, yeah. Now that makes sense.
Janice Chaka [:Ah, it was an moment. Oh, interesting. Okay. So in your, work that you do we're gonna talk about the work that you do now because it's really, really helpful and important. But what I wanna talk about is you mentioned that you would did one of these tests earlier on in your your life and your career. What was the first job that you ever had?
Matt McCarthy [:The first job I ever had was a I'll go with the first real post university job that I had, which was basically selling tires at a chain tire store. Not an Introvert type job.
Janice Chaka [:And why would you say that?
Matt McCarthy [:You're dealing with people all day every day at their best, at their worst. It wasn't just tires. It was service. And one thing I figured out is that people are super sensitive about their cars, especially when you ask them for several $100 to fix them.
Janice Chaka [:Oh. And so when you would if you remember, when you were doing this job, did you find it more draining than you would have thought?
Matt McCarthy [:Very much so. I I kind of expected it to be the dealing with things and transactions and no, the the people aspect of it was incredibly draining. I would come home every day after work and just not want to do anything more.
Janice Chaka [:And so how did you get around that and or how did you recharge to be able to keep doing that job?
Matt McCarthy [:Not well. I eventually I eventually left that job because it was so, so, so draining.
Janice Chaka [:Oh, okay. And had you, at that point, figured out that you're an introvert and that's and why it was Traveling, or you were still sort of discovering and on a journey?
Matt McCarthy [:I I was still definitely on the journey. In fact, I thought it was much more related to, purpose. You know, my my disconnection my my purpose wasn't selling tires. That was pretty clear to me. But I ended up leaving to this will be an interesting tangent to start a concert promotion business. And that again, I look at things transactionally, and it's definitely much more of a people business. And it was yet another learning experience.
Janice Chaka [:Interesting. Okay. And so would you you mentioned purpose, about jobs. Do you do you feel that now you have found your purpose in what you do?
Matt McCarthy [:I believe so. It's gonna be a different tangent than maybe what you're thinking from my bio, but I definitely do think so.
Janice Chaka [:Oh, go for it. What what is your purpose now?
Matt McCarthy [:So this will take a moment to explain, so bear with me. I I had a number of traumatic events during my early childhood, basically, pre memory. And I've only recently through a lot of, studying learning research, made the connection between the, the trauma that I experienced and what I felt more in more recent years, I would say, in the last 10, 15 years of depression, anxiety, lack of fulfillment, and lack of being able to accomplish the goals that I set. So, purposefully, now I am starting to coach others in a, I suppose you could say, a performance coaching manner, but with a focus on how to how to remove those barriers that are literally now within the body, from achieving those goals. So removing the barriers and then, I guess, you could say greasing the skids to help people get to their goals more quickly rather than not at all.
Janice Chaka [:I don't think that's too different from what you said previously. And with the the goal achieving, and and, like, figuring this out on the journey that you went on, why do you think this is so key to helping people go ahead and achieve The the goals that they set?
Matt McCarthy [:So there's a number of reasons. One big one is that when when people who have experienced a large amount of trauma in their background, they tend to have what I've heard term as a background alert, which means they're in a day to day basis, they're on a heightened level of alert. And when something comes in that is threatening or stressful, they move from that alert state into alarm much more quickly than somebody who may not have dealt with this. It goes back to hormones and neurology and some variety of physiological states. Yet we often look at it from a from an a mental perspective. You just have to grit. You have to take on a growth mindset. Just look at the, you know, the 8020 of it.
Matt McCarthy [:But because you're now in an alarm state, you can't do any of that. So the first step is really to bring down the the overall alert, the background alert, as well as reduce the impact of those alarm states. So by doing that, you get out of that bite, flight, freeze, fawn, mental perspective or neurological state into one where you can actually go about and do the things that you need to do to be able to accomplish those goals.
Janice Chaka [:That's super interesting. And so it does sound, love, that you're dealing a lot with people.
Matt McCarthy [:It is. Here's
Janice Chaka [:here's how I
Matt McCarthy [:would look at it. And it's all frankly, if I did nothing with people, that wouldn't be good for me. It wouldn't be healthy. So the way I approach it is insulating myself, creating almost an emotional bank account. So if I am doing things that add to my emotional capacity so say it is, you know, singing alone at home or, taking time to meditate or calm myself, walking on the beach. Fortunately, that's in close proximity, but watch walking in nature, and at the same time, also creating space in my schedule so that I am not constantly in the midst of productivity. Because that that mental energy from productivity also kinda heightens the alarm or the alert state. So in that way, I can still work with people whether it is in a speaking engagement or it's a 1 on 1 or 1 on a small group, conversation, you know, coaching conversation.
Janice Chaka [:Oh, thank you so much for bringing up the the thing about sort of being almost constantly busy and constantly working and constantly doing things. There has been talk of, you know, doing things as a form of procrastination to stop you from getting towards your goals or or doing what you're supposed to be doing. Does that sound a little bit like what you were talking about?
Matt McCarthy [:It's a little bit different for me. Sometimes it can be out of procrastination because I'm in a freeze state, and I can't seem to work on the thing that is high pressure.
Janice Chaka [:Mhmm.
Matt McCarthy [:But sometimes I am adding things out of fear. This will take a second to explain. Say, financially, I'm worried not necessarily about making the bills next month, but retiring or, you know, making sure my family is taken care of in later years if I can't work, things like that. So adding on additional to sources of revenue, which aren't aligned with what I'm already doing, it creates this overhead in a time, financial, emotional, and mental perspective. That's where I find myself tripping up is by adding those things in. And, again, because it's fear based, largely goes back to traumatic experiences.
Janice Chaka [:Yeah. Yep. I love the idea of the emotional bank account thing. And So with that in mind, what is something that you do on a regular basis, that you feel has helped you grow as a person and or your business?
Matt McCarthy [:I've named a couple of things already, but I'll repeat them. One is I do spend time walking in nature. In my case, it's the beach. I do it as often as I can. Mindfulness, meditation. So I'll I'll spend, yeah, I would love to spend 20 minutes a couple times a day, but it's usually more like 10 minutes once a day where I'm just maybe listening to a sound of waves, listening to white noise, and just doing my best to minimize my focus, and journal. I I have started journaling really only in the last, say, 9 months, and it makes a difference in my being able to both open up space in my mind and be able to understand a little bit better what I'm experiencing.
Janice Chaka [:What made you pick up journaling?
Matt McCarthy [:Props from every other personal improvement guru out there. It's funny. I realized only recently that I actually like writing. It's something that I grew up disliking in school, but I actually kind of enjoy it. It helps me think.
Janice Chaka [:Okay. And it helps you process. And Yes. Is there anything that you consistently say no to?
Matt McCarthy [:That's a, that's that's an area that I have a lot of ones that I want to consistently say no to. How about The? Sales jobs.
Janice Chaka [:But wait. But having your own business surely is a version of a sales job.
Matt McCarthy [:Yes and no. I I don't find it so much as sales. I I yeah. There's always selling and marketing involved. I do my best to outsource my marketing. And when it comes to selling, I find that if I'm communicating something that I truly believed in, Even if there's transaction at the end, it's far less about sales, and it's more about living out of purpose. It's not about selling. It's about helping people through, through something that I became aware of and I can help them with.
Matt McCarthy [:Yeah.
Janice Chaka [:Yeah. That makes a lot of sense. You mentioned you outsource your marketing, and you and from the sounds of it, that is something that you did on purpose intentionally. When did you make that decision and why?
Matt McCarthy [:Really only later last Career, the why is easy. It's it is a heavy emotional drain on me. Self promotion is something that I can unconsciously fight tooth and nail against. And, really, if if I'm promoting management consulting that I do or if I'm promoting, this coaching program, it it's effectively self promotion. So I it's it drains me of my energy and leaves me with no bandwidth to, you know, no bank account to do anything else. That's the lie.
Janice Chaka [:And you mentioned that you only started doing that late last year. What was the turning point, or what made you pull the no. I don't wanna say pull the trigger. The decide that, yes, this is what needs to happen now, and what difference has it made in these past few months?
Matt McCarthy [:So it's something that I had considered off and on for years. It was more a a sense of realization of how much my emotional drain was, we'll say, punishing me. The was definitely why the turning point. I'm only, only starting the process. I'm looking to engage a social media manager, but I'm using, a consultant to help me in terms of image in term brand image, in terms of, what type of content to put out The, website, other, more digital marketing tools. So just rattling off a laundry list, but has it helped? Yes. But I expect it to help even more in the long run.
Janice Chaka [:Okay. Well, I look forward to sort of seeing and hearing about what a difference it's made in your business and your your your emotional I was gonna say bank account, but I mean, emotional bank account in general or just bank account bank account. And it's really useful that you've sort of pinpointed or identified this and taken steps to to take it out of your day to day work that you have to do. As business owners, we kind of feel we have to do everything, so it's really good that you've gone ahead and highlighted that. And, thank you for that useful information and talking us through, your process and what you do and why. And I have one final question for you, and it is, in your opinion, is a hot dog a sandwich?
Matt McCarthy [:I love that question. You know, I'm gonna have to go with it is a variety of sandwich. Oh, oh,
Janice Chaka [:you stuck a little extra word in there. Okay. Why is it a variety of sandwich?
Matt McCarthy [:It's it's meat between basically 2 pieces of bread. So, yeah, that's a sandwich, but a hot dog kinda lives on its own. So it it's a variety. Just like just like a hamburger is a type of sandwich, but it's its own thing.
Janice Chaka [:Ah, okay. Alright. Thank you so very much. I really appreciate, what you've shared today. Can you please let, my listeners know where they can find out more about you and the work that you do?
Matt McCarthy [:Yeah. Definitely. So my web website, under revamp by my marketing folks is questful.life, l I f e. And, I actually developed an assessment for, anybody who's interested in understanding that trauma to goals connection that, that I give out for free. If, to The page assessment, if you would like it, You can text assessment to 33777, and it'll be sent right out to you. And there will be additional links of information. I'll end up, putting you on a newsletter if you'd like to be part of that. So, those are the best ways.
Matt McCarthy [:So assessment to 33777 or requestful.life.
Janice Chaka [:Excellent. Thank you so very much, Matt. I really appreciate it. This is Janice at The helping you build your brand and get hired. Have a great rest of your week.
