Episode 328

Answering Questions from Extroverts

Published on: 26th September, 2023

Primary Topic: Questions from Extroverts

- Question: Do you feel like you're missing out on social activities?

- Response: Depends on what social activities mean to the individual

- Explanation: Social activities can vary from large group events to one-on-one interactions

- Question: Are introverts just shy?

- Response: Introverts can be shy, but shyness is not exclusive to introverts

- Explanation: Introverts choose when to interact, not out of obligation

- Question: Do introverts need to change or become more extroverted?

- Response: No, there is nothing wrong with introverts as they are

- Explanation: Introverts have different needs and energy sources

- Question: Why are introverts so quiet?

- Response: Introverts may be listening, observing, or uninterested in the conversation

- Explanation: "So quiet" is subjective and compared to what or whom

- Question: Do introverts get lonely being alone so much?

- Response: There is a distinction between alone time and loneliness

- Explanation: Introverts choose to be alone for recharge, not out of loneliness

- Question: Why don't introverts speak up more in group discussions?

- Response: Several factors can influence introverts' participation

- Explanation: Need for time to process information, wait for the right opportunity, or gather thoughts before speaking up

Janice Chaka [:

Hello, and welcome to another episode of The Traveling Introvert. And today, I'm gonna do something a little different. I am gonna answer questions that extroverts have asked over the years and and hopefully give them an answer in a way that, ask some questions that people always seem to have. And one of the questions is, do you feel like you're missing out on social activities? And the answer is, what does social activities mean to you? Because my idea of social activity could be going to dinner with somebody. It doesn't have to be a large group or a party. I can go to parties. I will go to clubs and dance my little ass off. But, like, what do you mean by missing out on social activities? I think it really depends on what social means virtual human.

Janice Chaka [:

And then another question is, well, really, like, you're just shy. And, yes, there are introverts who are shy. There are also extroverts who are shy. But a lot of the time, it can be a mixture. But, generally, introverts will interact when they want to and when it's good for them, not just because they feel they have to. And that feeling that they have to is really detrimental. Another question from extroverts. Do you feel you need to change or become more extroverted? You should come out of your shell.

Janice Chaka [:

And the real answer is no. We are all put individuals. We all have our own needs and wants. What is wrong with us? Nothing. Do we need to change? No. Oh, become more extroverted. No. That's that that's not how I recharge, so why would that be a thing? I understand, on a base level, you feel that maybe some introverts are looking at extroverts going, oh, man.

Janice Chaka [:

I wish I could be like that, but not from an energy standpoint. I've done some questionnaires and some quizzes and things like that. And what I found is confident to speak up, being given the space to speak up because some people work in environments where they're not given that space to speak up because extroverts take up awe the air in the room, and they are allowed to do so because we're in a world where, like, the the rules are made for extroverts. I was having a DEI conversation the other day about how, depending on where who you are, you have learned the dominant culture, and you've learned how to navigate that dominant culture. The dominant culture doesn't have to learn how to navigate it because the culture was made for them. Just like that the culture was made for extroverts. Introverts have to learn how to navigate that culture. So yeah.

Janice Chaka [:

No. Don't feel the need to change. Do need to feel maybe the need to work the system, but not slowly to change. Age old question, why are you so quiet? Answer because I'm listening, because I'm observing, or because I'm zoning out and bored of whatever the hell it is you're waxing lyrical about. What do you mean by so quiet? So makes it sound like not I'm only quiet, but I'm like extra especially quiet. Do you mean I'm like a ninja? I don't think that's what you mean. Why are you so quiet? Compared to whom? Compared to what? Also, another this question is, do you get lonely being alone so much? And, yes, there is, for everyone, a line between alone time and recharge time and being lonely. They are 2 different things, and you need to learn what that line is and what you need to make sure that you don't get lonely, but it's not necessarily again, it's so much.

Janice Chaka [:

Don't don't you get lonely being alone so much? And it's like, well, no. Because I choose that alone time. If I'm not choosing that alone time, that is a different thing. But if I'm choosing that alone time, know it is not about being lonely. It is about recharging. And one that happens a lot in the work department. I've heard lots of people ask this or be asked this, is why don't you speak up more in group discussions? And it really depends how the group discussion is formatted. Have I had the information in advance? Use an agenda.

Janice Chaka [:

Are lots of people speaking over each other? Have I had the time to digest the information and then come up with an answer? Or am I still thinking? Am I pondering? Am I researching on the slide? Like, there are many reasons why I might not be speaking up right then and there in a group discussion. I might be waiting for the right time. I might be for someone to pause in whatever the hell they're talking about and catch your breath. Who knows? So those are some answers to questions that I've had from extroverts over the years that I thought I would answer in today's episode. Thank you for listening. This is Janice at The Career Introvert helping you build your brand and get hired. Have a great rest of your

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About the Podcast

The Traveling Introvert
A bite-sized podcast about traveling while running a business and being an introvert.
Not knowing what introversion was until my 30s, I feel that I wasted some of my early years by not really understanding myself. An inspiration for my business is that I want to help others understand themselves better, earlier on in their careers and their lives. Introversion is a very misunderstood area – introverts can suffer mentally and physically because people typecast them or act negatively towards them. It’s not nice to be trapped in a little box. When you label somebody, they tend to act like that label, which stops people from achieving their true potential. I don’t let being an introvert define me, I let it guide me.
If you are looking for some career coaching or just want to reach out
contact me at janice@thecareerintrovert.com