Episode 431
Advocates When You Need Them Most
This episode focuses on the power of having advocates and allies in the workplace, especially for introverts. It highlights how support can come in many forms, from standing up for a colleague when a sensitive topic is brought up, to using body language and key phrases to set boundaries and protect others. The episode encourages listeners to identify people who can be their champions—those who will speak up for them when they're not present—and to consider how they can do the same for others. The importance of open communication, setting clear expectations with advocates, and the unique impact of third-party support are emphasized. Listeners are also challenged to reflect on boundaries they want respected and to practice advocating for themselves and others, underscoring the importance of mutual support and appreciation in building a positive work environment.
Transcript
Hello and welcome to the Travelling Introvert. Today I want to talk about just who's really actually standing up for you at work when you don't realize it. I was at a recent event and someone gave me the heads up. They were like, person X is probably going to bring up a topic I really don't want to talk about, but I've made my stance clear, but they won't let it go. And of course, sure enough, the moment came, that person came up to me and started to talk about that subject. I was polite and firm, but I didn't just protect my own boundaries around this particular topic, but I defended my friend's boundaries as well. And I reminded person X that people get to live life on their own terms and it's not for them to dictate what those terms should be. Scroll forward.
Janice Chaka [:A few weeks later, that person mentioned me again, and this time to my friend. But no word was said about the original topic, so the message had landed. And this reminded me of something that's really important for introverts in the workplace. You don't need to be loud to be effective, but you do need to be aware and intentional and willing to back someone up when it counts and have someone who's willing to do that return. And that doesn't happen very, very often because it means having those conversations. It means getting someone to advocate for you, asking for someone to advocate for you. And so you need to think about how you can prepare responses in advance if you know that you need to advocate for somebody, using your body language and your tone to help set boundaries. And it could be as simple as someone saying an inappropriate joke and you set the boundary and the tone, or asking personal questions or setting unrealistic expectations.
Janice Chaka [:It happens all the time. But being somebody's ally, even when they're not in the room, is priceless. You have the power to redirect conversations that breach privacy or comfort. You can tactfully protect a team member's reputation or boundaries. And it could be just using a few key phrases like I'm not sure that's appropriate to bring up, or I think this person has already made their position clear, or let's keep the conversation focused on what matters for the team. Everybody, and especially introverts, need people who get them in the workplace. So finding those co workers or managers who will back them up when it counts. You need to think about who those people might be, have conversations with them, see where they lie.
Janice Chaka [:Also be their champions. How can you be a champion for somebody else? How can you back somebody else up when it counts for them. You can also start setting expectations with your advocates. Clear boundaries, open communication, when's best to come to them, when's best for you to go to, for them to come to you. And I just want you to think about what a difference this can make in the workplace because it's all well and good, you advocating for yourself, of course you should, but somehow it just lands differently when someone else does it for you. And that's why you should always look for champions, advocates who will speak up for you when you're not there. That's one of the sort of networking powers that people talk about is who is opening doors for you and talking about you and cheering you on when you are not in the room. So when you're thinking about networking and the people you know, think about things that people have done, things that other people have said, have they been champions for other people.
Janice Chaka [:Have you witnessed that? Another couple of things that you can do is think about two or three boundaries that you wish people respected more in the workplace or outside of the workplace. And for you to advocate for yourself, practice one or two phrases to use when those boundaries are crossed because boundaries will continue to be crossed it if you don't set that boundary and then reinforce it because some people just can't help themselves and will trample all over them time and time again. And then the other thing I challenge you to do, dear listeners, is to identify one person that you can advocate for this week and also send a thank you message to someone who's been a quiet champion for you. Thank you for listening. This is Janice at the Career Introvert helping you build your brand and get hired. I hope you have a great rest of your week.
